Take a look inside the priciest home for sale in West Vancouver

Credit to Author: Harrison Mooney| Date: Mon, 25 Nov 2019 08:01:20 +0000

Vancouver housing prices remain higher than Seth Rogen and David Chang eating jelly doughnuts on Granville Island, which means, for many local aspiring homebuyers, it’s time to think outside the box.

This is especially true if a box is all you can afford. Often it seems the only affordable place in Vancouver to hang your hat is the hatbox in which it came.

But many are leaving Vancouver for the surrounding areas, where they say the prices are a little more manageable, and they’re not wrong. While the priciest home in the city of Vancouver is listed at $40 million, West Vancouver’s priciest house is listed at a much more manageable $25 million, and if that seems like relative chump change to you, then you’re precisely the chump these realtors are looking for. Let’s take a tour, chump.

Built in 2018, this grand-scale, luxury, gated estate sits on 36,329 sq.ft. of land and boasts spectacular city and water views, as well as over 11,000 sq. ft. of living space on three expansive levels.

Check out this view. It’s a perfect place to look out over the entire Metro Vancouver region and entirely lose perspective.

This house features eight bedrooms, 12 bathrooms, five fireplaces — so you can host an entire summer camp without even knowing it. There’s also a full-sized basketball court, an indoor pool, a hot tub, and an outdoor pool, for those days when swimming indoors seems a little too “rec centre” for someone of your lofty status.

How can you go wrong with this pool, bathed in the midnight blue light of a West Vancouver night, and roaring fires on either side? Only by forgetting you have two pools.

But that’s far from the bluest thing this house offers, as this sprawling mansion features numerous places to enjoy Jennifer Lawrence’s standout performance as cunning, cobalt seductress Mystique in the X-Men film series.

You’ll relish watching X-Men from your office as you dream up tax evasion schemes at your desk. Have you considered starting a school for mutants? Heck, you could probably house them all in your eight-bedroom mansion and tell the CRA the whole thing is a workspace — and that’s just one idea inspired by the film that appears to be playing in every single room of this house.

You’ll absolutely adore unwinding in this stately living room, kicking your feet up and enjoying the sublime ocean views, or perhaps X-Men: Days of Future Past, as the mutants for their right to exist in a dystopian world that fears and distrusts them, not unlike the people who own homes like this, except everyone is rooting for the X-Men.

And don’t sleep on this elegant guest bedroom. Sleep in this bedroom, unless you’d rather stay up and watch X-Men on the flatscreen TV that’s mounted above a gorgeous stone fireplace. “That’s fire,” you’ll say, likely referring to Jennifer Lawrence’s riveting portrayal of a shape-shifting assassin in X-Men: Apocalypse.


If you fancy some poker or perhaps a drink, spend some time in this basement lounge area, where you can enjoy X-Men on multiple screens from your gaming table, just across the hall from a wine cellar. Imagine grabbing a 2007 Argentinian Malbec, dealing your friends in, and playing some Texas hold ’em while you keep a loose eye on Jennifer Lawrence as Mystique, constantly altering and rejuvenating her body’s cells and thereby retaining her youthful appearance despite being alive for more than 100 years.

Or, if you’re in the mood for a more cinematic experience, you can move to your personal theatre room and enjoy a classic film — X-Men, perhaps. This room features multiple cup holders, as well as at least one attention-holder: Jennifer Lawrence, charming as always, as she psionically shifts the formation of her biological cells at will to change her appearance and thereby assume the form of other humans and animals. Now that’s acting!

Finally, take a gander at this master bedroom, with its super-high ceilings, its beautifully carpeted floors, and its massive, floor-to-ceiling windows that showcase the beautiful and Mystique-like blue light of West Vancouver at dusk. One imagines it’s impossible to look out from these windows and not think of Jennifer Lawrence transforming from Raven to Mystique as she comes of age in X-Men: First Class.

This home is listed at $24,980,000, just $10 million more than Jennifer Lawrence makes per film after anchoring a trilogy of X-Men movies. But you probably already knew that if this listing caught your eye, because this house is clearly meant for the wealthiest J-Law lover in West Vancouver.

hmooney@postmedia.com

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