Will you do a ‘living funeral?’

MANILA — Comedian Ate Gay, who was diagnosed with cancer, recently had a living funeral—complete with flowers, photos, and a coffin-styled couch.

At first glance, it looked like a wake, but Ate Gay, whose real name is Gil Morales, is still very much alive. Friends said their “eulogies” and testimonies for Ate Gay, who was happy to hear their messages while still alive.

“Mahalaga yung mensahe nila habang nabubuhay ang isang tao. Mas lumalakas kami, mas gumagaling,” Ate Gay said.

Memorial park developer Forest Lake launched this new service in hopes that more Filipinos will become open to the concept and also on preparing for death, a topic not often discussed among family and friends.

Sociologist Bro. Clifford Sorita said living funeral is a new concept for many Filipinos. It is usually done for a person who is ill. But he feels many Filipinos find the event morbid, among other reasons for being detached to the concept.

First, he said, Filipinos value finality — which means that while there is still life, they will support or stick with that person because they cannot just bid goodbye.

“We cling to that notion of finality. Ayaw natin bumitiw, na yung taong ito ay buhay pa ay feeling mo pinapakawalan mo na siya,” Sorita said.

Next, he said, many Filipinos do not like to be praised in front of a lot of people and if they do, they only want praise when the job is done.

“Ayaw kasi natin na yung pinupuri tayo sa harapan natin. Ayaw natin makaramdam na parang feeling natin mayabang ang dating,” he added.

On the other hand, Sorita is confident that the living funeral concept can expand in the country. He said that this kind of event benefits both the person being remembered and the family and friends as well.

“Kapag naririnig mo na ang tao nagsasalita ng kabutihan tungkol sa yo, because of that sense of validation and gratitude, there is also self healing in your part,” he added.

Forest Lake will soon announce details of its new service. Sorita welcomes this new option for people who prefer to take this route.

And for Ate Gay, she said we must tell our loved ones how we truly feel while we are all still alive, before it becomes too late.

“Mas maganda na habang buhay nalalaman mo nararamdaman ng mahal mo sa buhay,” Ate Gay said.