Bad joke

Credit to Author: Tempo Desk| Date: Thu, 02 May 2019 11:13:36 +0000

 

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A MEDIA briefing, it was called.

Long on grief, brief on answers.

The National Water Resources Board, represented by Director Dr. Sevillo David, told us to hope for rain – he didn’t say pray – that it may come late in May or by June. Did I or you need anyone to tell us rain can only come from the sky, or heaven, where God resides?

He said water meant for irrigation will be reduced and diverted to residential customers in May and June; anyway it’s harvest time, so farmers won’t be needing much water. Good for us, bad for our farmers. Reassuring? Dam it!

He added, punctuating every three words with “no” to mean “ano?” or no as the opposite of yes; “There will be sufficient supply of water in May and June. However, the level in Angat dam is low and continues to be low.” We’ve known that since more than 30 days ago! What he didn’t tell us is what happens when the level hits critical and we stubbornly continue to draw water from Angat. What are the consequences? Bet the board wouldn’t know.

“We wrote the Bureau of Soils to conduct cloud-seeding” – we were ahead of you on that one, Dr. Dav id. We also know that there have been no cloud-busting operations because the clouds have not been fat enough. Are you aware of that?

The day after the briefing, news headlines warned: “Conserve water, save Angat dam.”

How cute! What have we been doing since March but conserving water? What’s there to conserve? As one exasperated housewife screamed, “Save water? Save what? What water?”

You call this a briefing? What grief!

In a radio interview, the director had the cheek to advise consumers that if they each saved four liters a day, it would amount to 48 million liters water to go around. Good multiplication, bad joke.

Director David, you say El Nino and its effects could last well into December. What is the board doing in the meantime, besides asking MWSS, Manila’s Woeful Service Snails, to keep activating deep wells as a standby source for firefighting and “other vital services”? I hope the needs of 12 million Metro Manila residents qualify in your book as vital.

At the end of the briefing, Dr. David assured media that the board “will closely monitor Angat for timely intervention.” Timely? Come again? Intervention? Time to ask for heavenly intervention by the angels and saints, you mean.

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